Crazy Things I Saw and/or Read About
Oh, right... I have a website. Great. I guess I should write something.
Well, okay, so today was really beautiful. Mid-70s, sunny, with a pleasant breeze, and that rare kind of peaceful Sunday feeling, so unlike the typical, "Oh fuck, tomorrow's Monday" kind of Sunday feeling. It was so nice out, I wandered aimlessly around my neighborhood for a couple hours, only returning when I got thirsty. Along my travels, I saw very little, really. Until, that is, I decided to walk down Wilshire Boulevard a little. Coming up Western toward Wilshire, I saw the corner of the Wiltern Theater's marquee: "Presented by Corona Extra."
What, I wondered, was being presented by Corona Extra? A Jimmy Buffet concert? Sammy Haggar? Some sort of upscale Mexican act? Jimmy Buffet? But no, it was none of those things.
As I turned the corner, I looked up at the center of the marquee: "IN CONCERT - MARILYN MANSON." Sure enough, the sidewalk was lined with teenagers in black t-shirts and white pancake makeup, as youthful and non-threatening group as I've ever seen (and three friends and I spent one summer driving around the country, following an Up With People tour). I walked on down Wilshire and passed the youths who stood and sat on the sidewalk all the way down to the Denny's on the corner of Oxford, their perpetual teenage gloom standing no chance against the loveliness of this perfect weather. Many of them even smiled. It was all very confusing.
On the next block, I found a few equally young people skateboarding on a concrete embankment. "Hey, fellas," I said to them, "wanna help me beat up some goths?"
"No," answered the one I took to be their leader, "we're playing 'skateboarder'. Leave us alone or we'll cry." So I did.
As I walked on, my mind turned back to the fact that Corona fucking Extra was sponsoring a Marilyn Manson show. It just seemed wrong. Unless, I supposed, what made it 'Extra' was goat's blood or something. But I didn't think that likely. Not in this day and age. No, the FDA would have a field day with something like that. In a blind panic now, I ran home as fast as my fat little legs would carry me and 'went on the line', as those kids in their white makeup would have called it.
Sure enough, Marilyn Manson's not the only big-ticket act to be sponsored by a weirdly unrelated corporate entity. For instance:
Well, okay, so today was really beautiful. Mid-70s, sunny, with a pleasant breeze, and that rare kind of peaceful Sunday feeling, so unlike the typical, "Oh fuck, tomorrow's Monday" kind of Sunday feeling. It was so nice out, I wandered aimlessly around my neighborhood for a couple hours, only returning when I got thirsty. Along my travels, I saw very little, really. Until, that is, I decided to walk down Wilshire Boulevard a little. Coming up Western toward Wilshire, I saw the corner of the Wiltern Theater's marquee: "Presented by Corona Extra."
What, I wondered, was being presented by Corona Extra? A Jimmy Buffet concert? Sammy Haggar? Some sort of upscale Mexican act? Jimmy Buffet? But no, it was none of those things.
As I turned the corner, I looked up at the center of the marquee: "IN CONCERT - MARILYN MANSON." Sure enough, the sidewalk was lined with teenagers in black t-shirts and white pancake makeup, as youthful and non-threatening group as I've ever seen (and three friends and I spent one summer driving around the country, following an Up With People tour). I walked on down Wilshire and passed the youths who stood and sat on the sidewalk all the way down to the Denny's on the corner of Oxford, their perpetual teenage gloom standing no chance against the loveliness of this perfect weather. Many of them even smiled. It was all very confusing.
On the next block, I found a few equally young people skateboarding on a concrete embankment. "Hey, fellas," I said to them, "wanna help me beat up some goths?"
"No," answered the one I took to be their leader, "we're playing 'skateboarder'. Leave us alone or we'll cry." So I did.
As I walked on, my mind turned back to the fact that Corona fucking Extra was sponsoring a Marilyn Manson show. It just seemed wrong. Unless, I supposed, what made it 'Extra' was goat's blood or something. But I didn't think that likely. Not in this day and age. No, the FDA would have a field day with something like that. In a blind panic now, I ran home as fast as my fat little legs would carry me and 'went on the line', as those kids in their white makeup would have called it.
Sure enough, Marilyn Manson's not the only big-ticket act to be sponsored by a weirdly unrelated corporate entity. For instance:
- Placido Domingo's latest tour was sponsored by Kraft Singles.
- Mandy Moore's recent string of performances was billed as "Evinrude Outboard Motors Presents..."
- Puddle of Mudd's 2004 tour was underwritten by ConAgra.
- The Rolling Stone's hugely succesful "Licks" tour was sponsored by the My Little Pony Wishing Well Princess Playset.
- 50 Cent and G Unit's recent series of stadium dates was presented by the Cedrus Corporation's 'Lumina' fiber optic response pads (for use with magnetic resonance imaging devices).
- Hank Williams, Jr. is sponsored by Summer's Eve Feminine Cleansing Cloths.
posted by Rob at
12:05 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
Links to this post:
Create a Link
<< Home