Those Hilarious Nazis!

Man, am I tired! On top of that, I just read a bunch of posts on a white power message board in which typical Jewish traits were discussed. Pretty much your typical, "Jews are sneaky and have big noses" stuff, but I did learn a couple interesting things. For instance, Jews use quotation marks to play down the significance of certain "facts." Also, and far more shocking, both Dwight David Eisenhower and Franklin Delano Roosevelt (but presumably not Teddy) were Jews. I would have thought that would have gotten more press, but once again, the Aryans are hoarding all the good trivia. Here's some other stuff I learned:

• Jews can shape-shift
• Not only was the Holocaust grossly exaggerated by the Zionist cabal that controls all human thought, it was actually a case of Jewish bankers attempting to eradicate German death camp guards, and then trying pin it on the Germans after the Jews' mechanical incompetence led to the accidental gassing of two or three Jewish serial child murderers
• There is a secret World Government run by a panel of twelve particularly dastardly Jews: Peter Jennings, Bill Gates, Tony LaRussa, Cokie Roberts, Bishop Desmond Tutu, Margaret Thatcher, Francois Le Pen, Bashir Assad, Victoria Beckham, Latin Heartthrob Gerardo, Ciccolina, and Yao Ming
• Jews are so sneaky that even a baby Jew can trick an unsuspecting Aryan into trading his birthright for a bowl of porridge*
  
• The reason Jews have big noses? So they can smell money**

* That, I believe, was the first Bible joke I've ever written. Can you place the source?
** The alternate answer, and the punchline of which I'm proudest, is, "Because they're ostentatious!"