Why Gary Condit Should Be The Next VP
I had this whole big idea for a a big special audio treat, but no one seems to read this site, so I ain't gonna bother. Not even going to bother writing it, since it's the kind of material that I may as well save for the novel. Here's a wee taste of how it might have been:
(Imagine you are listening to me read this in a subtle but hilarious character voice)
I'm Bram, and here is what's going on around town:
Music -
Friday, Prognosis brings their unique brand of synthesizer operatics to Club Upstairs with supporting act The Uncle Machine.
Tribute acts Whole Lotta Led and China Cat Sunflower duke it out in another round of Hippies vs. Metalheads Saturday night at Tequila Sunset's. Half price shooters from 11 to midnight.
Comedy -
Improvination is hosting another tickle night at the Improvination theater
Theater -
The Six Counties Community College Player are staging the original musical, "The Man From Minnesota", about the life and times of Walter Mondale. Tickets are free.
The Earnest Little Community Theater is running their production of von Trindel's "Night, Dark, Black" for one final week. Red wine, Triscuits, and apple wedges will be served.
That's all you're getting, maybe forever. This totally isn't worth it if no one's reading, and I'm not about to go through the hell of trying to drum up traffic again. This blogging shit's yesterday's news. I'm going back to stripping. (Ha ha ha! That's a Diablo Cody joke! If I had half her talent, it would have been a much funnier joke. She's a comic fucking genius. The George S. fucking Kaufman of her generation, if you ask me.)
Okay. Eat one. Bye.
posted by Rob at
11:28 PM
3 Comments:
It's not about the glory, Hondo. Think of yourself as a one-man cultural water-reclamation project. (Like my brother-in-law, you may even occasionally find some jewelry in the poop.)
2:44 AM
No!!!
You're way better than Diablo Cody. JUNO FUCKING SUCKED!!!
Keep at it, Champ. You can do this.
4:19 PM
I can do a whole lot more than this. The problem is that toiling away in secret on things that end up going nowhere is equally ungratifying. But at least there's potential in that. This is good for maybe trying to work my way out of writers' block now and then or if I have something that cannot be wrenched awkwardly into something bigger, like some current events thing that I need to speak out on, which seems to happen pretty much never. Anyway, don't worry, you two. I have nothing better to do with my time.
6:26 PM
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